SWNerd:  Hi all! I'm back, and less bald! Anyway, wasting no time to allow Gamer to gain the upper hand, SWNerd runs like the wind and tags Bookworm.

Bookworm: If it weren't for Rocket Robin Hood. Rocket Robin Hood. Galactic defender of the entire Galaxy. He steals from the Astro Rich and gives to the Galactic Poor. Prince John, despot ruler. Sherrif of Nott. Bookworm smiles. He is suddenly riding a gray horse with a spiky mane. Music from Samurai Warriors begins playing. "This is great, right Matsukaze?" A sky ninja comes up. He says- "Don't say you don't remember, 3 years ago, I saw you!" BW-"Sorry, I really don't remember." "That's it, Come on." Strike ninjas begin dancing in the backround. "A rumble in the capital, This is Grrreat!!!!" Gamer says.- It's a Fight!!! Bookworm leaps at Gamer and pokes him in the eye with his wand while slicing him in the left shoulder with his sword.

Gamer: OW! That really hurt! Gamer pulls out his revolver from Half-Life and shoots Bookworm in the foot, splattering blood on his mechanized suit. He licks it only to find it's ketchup. "Heeey, what are you trying to pull?"

Bookworm: "Indeed." He banishes the bullets before they leave the gun. He then buys a vanilla coke drinks it, and throws the can at Gamer. "Hjaoosdl." Bookworm says feebly as the can is blown back in his face. He falls to the ground, overcome.

Gamer: His tentacles lift him back up and he picks Bookworm up and crushes his arms preventing further purchases of any carbonated beverages.

Bookworm: "HEEEYYY" He uses the severing charm to cut the tentacles and aparates a few feet back.

Gamer: Just like the guy in the movie, the arms resist severage...age. Instead, all 4 tentacles hurl themselves at Bookworm, sending him flying to where he was going to apparate. Albeit a few points of damage. F--.

Bookworm: As he flies backwards, he summons a trampoline and bounces back, only to be hit again, this continues until the trampoline is destroyed and lands on a bed of nails. Unfortunately, it doesn't so much work as not work. He gets all these little holes in him, which are dissipated due (Due to this sentences I can only recommend a spell checker.-Trekie NAO NOTE: and so this is the first time in history Trekie spelled something right over Bookworm.) (Dangit! I didn't write that. DM, have you been "Spellchecking" my stuff again?-Bookworm) to the paradox of those guys who lie on nails. Bookworm then punches Gamer in the jaw, large letters portraying SOCKO! flash onscreen, temporarily blinding all present.

Gamer: After Gamer's eyes are refocused, he drops a small vial of liquid, which cracks and disperses in the ground. "Blast darnit, there goes my water...yeees, water." He takes no more action and awaits Bookworm's next attack.

Bookworm: Summons a gun and shoots Gamer in the head. "I'm not going anywhere near that "water." Oh yeah, and SWNerd is dead, he obviously wasn't paying attention to any of the rules or to what I was saying, cheating twice means death. By the way, DM's out of Nao. He said I can't spell and he can."

Gamer: "I take sympathy on your ordeal.." the water, turning out to be nano-probes, make their way to Bookworm, and slowly start eating away at his innards. Bookworm attempts to apparate, but the nano-probes have attached themselves to his cells and keep replicating themselves, which also dispels any attempt at teleporting them away (because there are literally millions). Bookworm is effectively taken out of the duel. "Choose your next challenger, defenders of The Phantom Menace."

Bookworm: "Indeed." He slashes both his own legs off and replaces them with peg legs. He then burns and destroys the entire area where the nano-probes were. "Hmm. An unfortunate accident. But if Wasp can fence with one arm, I can do it with no legs. Oh, and I'm now on Gamer's team (tagged out) and DM doesn't exist in the duel world, ok? Excellent."

Trekie: "Well, since SWNerd is rarely on, and Bookworm went to the other side, I will take up the battle for Episode I." Trekie shouts this from the inside of a building, suddenly, in a shower of glass he leaps out. The shards ricochet dangerously about, however Gamer's armour is strong enough to withstand the glass. In mid-flight, Trekie fires a giant barrage of bullets at Gamer with his custom gun. As the bullets striek towards their target, he flys just behind them with katana raised and ready to deal out death.

Gamer: Uses force speed to run from the line of bullets, then runs behind and uses the force again to push Trekie into his own bullets.

Trekie: Such a tactic would be effective, were Trekie not flying, therefore when gamer came behind him, Trekie tucked swiftly, and charged Gamer again, the force push backed Trekie off, but it wasn't powerful enough to send him into the bullets. Trekie recovers, and draws a pair of phasers on Gamer, cutting large swaths on opposite sides of him.

Gamer: "Oh yeah?" Gamer takes eats a ration from Metal Gear, really, really, fast. His sides are mostly recovered. Then he retracts the Ock tentacles and floats in the air himself. He is turned into Durendal from BG2 and pulls out the Equalizer and Angurvadal +5. He flys towards Trekie, swords outward.

Trekie: Trekie levels his katana. As Gamer attacks in dual weild fashon, Trekie successfully blocks one sword while avoiding the other. He counters with a mid-sectional swing of his katana. Gamer blocks the blow, however the position is awkward for him, so the katana makes a small bruise on Gamer's side (because what with the almost block, it couldn't pierce the armour.). Gamer then counters with the other sword. Trekie redirects it with a kick to the arm. Gamer mounts another attack which Trekie dives backwards to avoid. Trekie spins, once he comes around, he charges, his katana swings in a blazing arc.

Bookworm's note: Just in case you haven't read Gilded Chain, Durendal is originally from that book, and while BG2 Durendal is good, Gilded Chain Durendal is better. Also, as I have joined Team Gamer, it is now known as team Durendal, or the King's Blades.

Gamer: Holds Trekie's head in place, preventing him from hitting Gamer with the swords.

Trekie: Sorry for the hold up, but Gamer note that I'm just using one sword, and could you please let me know with what you are holding mey head, and how that stops me from using my sword at all. (You might also want to note how you grabbed my head when I'm screaching at you nearing the speed of sound, and As soon as I got near you, I was going to Slice at you.)

Gamer: (Cancels hold head) Holds up a very thin blade in the trajectory of Trekie's head.

Trekie: Trekie doesn't try to bend the blade, that's impossible, instead he only tries to realize the truth. There is no blade. Then he sees that it is not the blade that bends, it is only himself. Therefore, the blade moves aside, and Trekie swings down with his katana, a ray of red seems to sear behind it as it comes down at Gamer's head.

Bookworm: Alright then. So, the blade doesn't exist, but the blade Trekie has does exist. Kind of cheap don't you think? Anyway, this isn't the Matrix so you'd think the blade still would exist. By your logic, none of this exists so therefore no one can win. Alright, where's the aspirin.

Trekie: Perhaps if you'd read the attack properly, you would note that the blade doesn't exist, but it would still hurt Trekie. The whole "there is no blade" thing was just misquoteing the matrix, in order to show how I bent the blade. Back to the duel, the katana is about to hit you Gamer, might want to do somthing there.

Gamer: Throws Commodore at Trekie's head.

Trekie: A swift crescent kick deflects Commodore, and the sword continues straight at Gamer's head. (technically, that is kind of cheap, but in reality Trekie would simply cut commodore in two. Since Trekie is a fan of commodore, he has decided to be cheap rather than kill commodore.)

Gamer: His tentacles spring up and clutches the blade effectively severing it from the hilt. Another tentacle clutches Trekie and then Gamer says: How are you going to get yourself out of this one?

Trekie: "Actually I don't have to." As Gamer brings up his tentacle, it is sliced apart by the katana. Gamer is at first attstonished at the strength of the blade, he then sees why it was so powerful. The strange red light, was what human eyes could see of a phaser being shot parralel to the blade of the kantana. The slice continues, and reaches Gamer's personal sheilding. Here the phaser is stopped, but Trekie continues. The Katana goes unharmed through the sheilds, and continues it's path. Trekie's arm then passes through the sheilds also, and the Phaser begins fireing again on the other side. It slices through the impact suit, and makes a farely deep cut down Gamer's body. Trekie is then grabbed by the tenticle. but is almost instantly beamed out, and replaced farther away.

Gamer: Takes off his tentacles and places them in his transporter buffer. Blood gushes out of the right of his torso as the HEV issues morphene into his system to lessen the pain. The nanoprobes in all his cells start to meld back together the fabric of his skin, but this not only takes long, but cannot mend massive gashes without aid of the HEV. Gamer casts transform on himself and turns into a duel-wielding Max Payne with Morpheus sunglasses clipped to his nose. He summons duel Desert Eagles from Half-Life: Opposing Force. He silently mutters "Bring it on," then cringes from more pain as more blood gushes out from his wound, which still hasn't fully healed. By now, the entire area around Gamer is stained red. He summons generic bad guys from Max Payne 2 and starts shooting at them, increasing his speed but slowing everything around him as more bad guys drop. Then he starts firing at Trekie, with the bullets now seeming to fire much, much faster than they normally would because Trekie has been slowed partially.

"Gee" says Trekie "You're right the bullets are faster, they will be slightly harder to evade. Oh wait, no they won't." Trekie raises his hand and the bullets feeze "Nice try jerk, but if it's a gun fight you want it's a gun fight you'll get." Trekie disappears. He has been beamed somewhere. he appears momentarily to fire a large barrage of bullets. he then hurls himself behind a building.

Gamer: You forget I have "bullet" dodging powers too. Gamer, with level 3 force seeing and speed, dodges some bullets, but one hits him in the abdomen, leaking even more blood onto the field. He cringes, but pulls out a katana and raises his hand parallel to the ground. Then, in a Morpheus-like gesture (Neo too) he beckons Trekie to duel. (Just wondering: which game are your present katana skills from? Not to say that I can't think of one, I can think of many, but just for the human interest angle, what game were you thinking?-Trekie)

Trekie: "Oh a sword fight. You're more of a true fighter than I thought. Let's roll!!" Trekie pulls his sheathed katana from inside his robes. He slowly cracks his neck to the right in true Smith fasion.

Gamer: Sits down in his blood and starts stretching. He also cracks his knuckles (without the use of two hands).

Trekie: Trekie drops his sheathed katana onto his foot, and points his hands at Gamer in a gun like fasion, he then cracks his wrists by pointing them down.

Gamer: Like a spell caster, he starts cracking his knuckles at Trekie like a sorcerer would stereotypically cast a spell. (Note: Gamer has gained the ability to crack his knuckles without 2 hands). Magic shoots out and Trekie gets hurt.

Trekie: "arghh." says Trekie "I require surgery quickly." a helecopter desends and picks him up, it flys away as the M*A*S*H theme plays. After a breif time Trekie returns, ready for action.

Gamer: Force jumps into the air and aims himself at Trekie, katana in hand. Then he shoots himself forward, flying at high speed towards him katana outstretched and 5 bright rocks flying behind him. The katana creates glare which temporarily blinds Trekie enough for him to fly un-attacked.

Trekie: Someone once said 'know thine enemy' Trekie knows Gamer well, he would like to add 'know what thine enemy uses' Trekie knows what a katana is, but he has no idea what these glowing rocks are. Therefore, he desides descrection is the better part of valor (Okay guys the creepiest thing just happened to me, instead of writing valor I started writing philedelphia, I know I can't spell it, and when I realized it was wrong was when I noticed. Is that crazy or what?) and flys up into the air, avoiding Gamer's attack. He pulls his katana out in one hand, and his gun in the other, he fires a barrage at Gamer.

Gamer: One bullet clips the top of his left pinky finger but the rest fly by. He flies towards Trekie (katana sheathed), knocks aside the katana, and punches him in the nose. His blood smears on Trekie's face, and then Trekie feels a small tingle.

Trekie: Trekie thinks 'tingles are never good' he is beamed up, and medically scanned. Gamer please type in what they find here: they detect nano-probes imbedded in the brain and spinal cord cells. The only way they can be removed is if a: my move is carried out or b: you destroy those millions of cells, which will temporarily paralyze and or dampen his brain functions.

*Trekie is beamed back behind a building, but due to non-cheapness, the grenades are redirected by the Force and Gamer to hit him and shrapnel is imbedded in him. However, the nano-probes are somehow eliminated by the Enterprise.

Gamer: Uses the Force and the powers of Gandalf to shuffle the shrapnel all inside Trekie. As a final deathblow, he moves them towards Trekies heart and brain and causes them to heat up and melt his innards effectively killing him.